complain, complain, complain...

So I started my diet on Tuesday... I was excited at first and went to the grocery store to get my food and spent a shitload. Then I bought my scale. I wanted a nice one so I spend another shitload. Then this afternoon I realized I had run out of food so I went out and bought more to hopefully last me a few weeks...

Yesterday I was really down in the dumps (do people still use that expression?) because I weighed myself in the morning, which you shouldn't do until week 4, and I wasn't losing weight. Then I dropped my food at work and since it was yogurt and not an apple or something that could have been washed it was uneatable. Unless I licked it off the floor, which I probably would have done had there not been coworkers around. Strangers, fine. Coworkers, I have to see them everyday so probably not. I had my snack and lunch like planned and come home for dinner, drop that on the floor as well and dog comes and eats it. Leila has had a cold for about a month now, so I couldn't drop everything and drag my poor little girl out to the store. So I ate some fruit and a little chicken. Then I made the mistake of weighing myself again and found I gained 2lbs.. How? I don't know, but I do know this is why its very specific you should NOT be weighing yourself on an hourly basis or you will be sadly disappointed and pissed off, as I am.

Typically I would have given up by now.. pathetic, I know. The fact that I have invested so much money is whats keeping me going. That and the fact that my daughter is three years old and I still have a baby gut. Uggghhh, I have a long long road ahead of me and I am ready to suck it up and be skinny. I have made Leila lunch and dinner all week and watched her eat Valentines treats from her grandparents and been super strong in not "just tasting one". Tomorrow is my niece's birthday party where there will be cake. I love cake. If I had to pick one thing to eat for the rest of my life I'd pick ice cream cake. Tomorrow I get to stare at it and drool. That's the worst part, when its right in front of you.

I have been eating a lot of omelettes loaded up with veggies and to me that's a meal I would eat if I were on a diet or not. There is no alcohol allowed!! I am not a big drinker to begin with, as I think I mentioned before, but its hard to not drink when everyone else is.

I am so grumpy from all the cravings and the fact that my crappy car needed maintenance this week so I had to dip into my new car savings. Tomorrow I will try to be a little more chipper but for now I am a grouch. Tomorrow is Valentine's Day and we're going to have brunch at my mom's then Leila and I are getting our nails done and then my husband and I are going to dinner and a movie. Something for this bitchy hungry woman to look forward to. Diet Sprite and Dunkin Donut iced tea are my new BFFs! Black coffee (with splenda) is going to take some getting used to. Whether or not I like it doesn't matter since I need coffee to wake me up in the morning or I'm useless. Also I haven't been drinking my two liters of water as instructed. Its so hard to drink that much water! After awhile it starts to taste gross. Yes, it can happen.

I took pictures to do a before and after but I think I will wait until after to post them. I'm just not ready yet.

It's here!

I got my personalized 1st Personal Diet today!! I just finished reading everything and totally forgot I need a scale to weigh out my food. Crap. I meant to buy one over the weekend but I have to go grocery shopping for my food so I may as well just get one then. After reviewing my blood work results it looks like it wasn't as much of a hot mess as I thought it would be. Everything looks normal, I'm not even close to diabetic, which I wouldn't have been surprised about.

So far my personalized diet is not what I was expecting. Its pretty plain and simple. Three meals a day and it lists 3-5 choices of what you may eat per meal, none of them are much. I suppose the diet will not change for 12 weeks or whenever I reach my goal weight. Then I will begin "re-feeding" which is basically introducing normal foods to the body. The good news is the food is pretty basic and plain so I wont have to go out and spend a ton of money on new food.

Tomorrow I will weigh myself, measure myself and take pictures of my hot bod. I cant wait. (sarcasm) I will officially begin my diet on Tuesday.

The real shitty part is that I am going on a mini weekend vacation. I will have to be the party pooper who has to bring my own food. Other than all that, I am excited and very determined and motivated. The plan says that my ideal weight for my height should be around 103-109 but that seems a little too small to me. Its more important to me on how I look and how my clothes fit than how much I actually weigh. YAY!

On another note... The Saints win Super Bowl XLIV!! WHO DAT!!! They deserved it, that was exciting. What was not exciting was to come home this afternoon to find many many messy men in my front room surrounded by a 50" plasma TV that I had never seen before. Apparently it was a steal. I'll be the judge of that when I check out my credit card tomorrow. Not tonight, I'm just not up to it right now.

Titanic is on and its taking me right back to Leo's Romeo and Juliet days when I was but a wee girl writing letters to Leo confessing my love. Ahh, its nice to know I am in the same mindset I was when I was eight years old. Not much taller and not really any more mature either.

Happy February!!!

Saturday I got my blood taken for my diet. It sucked. As I previously mentioned, I am terrified of needles. I hate shots, but having blood taken.. gah. Did I mention I have three tattoos? They're all small, about the size of a quarter, but getting them didn't bother me one bit. I'm obviously a freak.

Anyway, the diet should come in my email (I'm guessing) in a week or so, so I will do measurements and weight when it arrives. I'm excited!